MATTHEW MONTGOMERY

“Art has always been my refuge, 

my shelter from the internal storm.”

Matthew was born November 3, 1984 in Winnipeg, Manitoba and died February 5, 2025, by suicide. He was 40 years old, having fought long and hard against depression, an illness he so aptly described as “a black dog that haunts my steps, as some writer dubbed it, [churning] my emotions, [amplifying] them, [broadcasting] them out through my body.” He was, however, so much more than what his illness wanted him to believe.

Matthew was a collector who surrounded himself with the things and simple experiences that brought him joy: cats, physical media, walks, books, saxophone solos, coffee, trips to the movies, finding the perfect gift, bed, more books, hot dogs, road trips to Target, taking off his socks after a long day at work, and even more books. The people he chose to confide in tended to also appreciate small moments of beauty over large demonstrations of extravagance. Over the course of his lifetime, he curated a small but devoted circle of friends and loved ones, people with whom he enjoyed reciprocal relationships rooted in shared interests and a similarly dry, often dark, sense of humour.

Matthew leaves behind his partner of 11 years, Lindsay Brown; his bestie, Kathleen Friesen; his aunts Shari and Shelley; uncles Dave and Peter; cousins Jonny and Regis; grandparents Harry and Sharon; and, an endless number of friends, chosen family, colleagues, and admirers.

Matthew was an only child, born to young David and Lisa at the Grace Hospital, a stone’s throw away from the various homes they lived in throughout St. James. He was a student in the French-Immersion program attending École Bannatyne, Golden Gate Middle School, and Silver Heights Collegiate. His teachers often commented on both his proficiency with reading and his disorganized desk. He worked best on his own, but at the same time was very social, getting easily distracted from his work. However, when he did get down to it, he wrote stories that while at times meandering, were creative and demonstrated great potential. It’s possible that this creativity was connected to his love of movies, particularly of Ghostbusters (1984). He was obsessed and knew the words by heart by the time he was 4 or 5. One of the best moments he had while visiting New York as an adult was visiting Hook & Ladder Company 8, more affectionately known as Ghostbusters Fire Station.

As a child, Matthew was very lovey and affectionate. Even as a young teen, he was always after a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Despite dealing with mean kids at school, home was a safe place where he was loved and could love. He was grateful for the opportunity to build a strong relationship with his Auntie Shari who lived with him and his parents for 10 years.

Matthew (or Matt, as his teachers knew him) graduated from Silver Heights Collegiate in 2002. He did not particularly enjoy his time as a high school student, often feeling bored and harbouring a quiet desire to be involved in the theatre program. He really wished he’d have been in a musical. Matthew found joy in reading independently, something he was far more interested in than whatever was going on in the class at the time, and did speak fondly of the teachers who would carve out space for him to do so. It was in these moments of personal exploration through literature and comics that he began to develop as a thinker and writer. He was particularly appreciative of the support he received from his English teacher at Silver, Mr. Mike MacWilliam.

He spent a number of years working in kitchens - Michele’s, Moxies, and Original Joe’s - and the atmosphere provided him with opportunities to meet new people and to party, which was perfect for someone in his late teens and early-to-mid 20s. During this time, Matthew continued his formal education at Red River College. However, the program was not a good fit, so he decided to pursue a 4-year Honors Degree in English from the University of Winnipeg instead. Here he had the opportunity to learn with and alongside wonderful mentors like Andrew Burke, Heather Milne, Deborah Schnitzer, Candida Rifkind, and Jenny Heijun-Wills. These relationships continued as he enrolled in the Masters of Cultural Studies program, commencing in September of 2013.

The M.A. program pushed Matthew to engage with a range of forms, genres, and concepts which would serve to elevate his writing, challenge his thinking, and push him to evolve as a human. He voraciously consumed the wide range of texts laid out in the syllabi, as well as any and all supplementary material. Matthew had this super-human ability to sit down at a computer and, in a burst of stream-of-consciousness, write a stunning paper that proposed unique and well-articulated arguments. What was perhaps most impressive happened when he shared these ideas with others; he was able to seamlessly transition from academic terminology to more accessible language, bringing people in rather than alienating them. His humble intelligence made him approachable and welcoming, traits that remained with him until his death.

A few people in his Cultural Studies cohort came to become some of his closest friends, one even ending up his partner in life and in state-sanctioned union. Matthew dated Lindsay for a month before he moved in with them, bringing copious books and LEGO along. Eight months later, in August of 2014, Matthew and Lindsay were married in a small backyard ceremony. Every year, like clockwork, Matthew would mention how perfectly their wedding captured their personalities and would emphasize that he would do it all over again the exact same way.

His wit was exceptional and often caught people off guard. What was perhaps most fascinating about his sense of humour was that similar to his taste in film, music, books, and art, there was such range. He could make a pun about the most esoteric aspect of theory right after using a post-it note to turn the title of a book or film into a statement about genitals or bodily functions. Shrek, Lies, and Videotape was one of Lindsay’s favourites. He knew what made him laugh and what a laugh it was: a sharp, deep, loud guffaw that would fill the room. It meant something when you made him laugh because you knew you had earned it.

The two of them lived in a number of apartments and a rental home (one with high ceilings and a perpetually beeping smoke alarm, and one with a shower absolutely unsuited to his 6’1” frame), later finding their dream home in Minto. Though the LEGO collecting cooled down, books continued to cover every surface of - and fill every cupboard in - the house, finally landing permanently in a beautifully displayed collection.

There couldn’t be a more perfect job for Matthew than the one he held for 10 years at McNally Robinson Booksellers. He was constantly surrounded by books, music, and film, and everyone there embraced him. He wore his rainbow lanyard proudly, always knowing that it was safe for him to be his queerest self there, taking such pride in working for an independent, locally-owned business. He was deeply invested in the bookstore’s success and was a beloved coworker to all. He was a warm and witty presence in the store, both on the floor with customers and a charming source of support and strong opinions for his colleagues. His creativity, sarcasm, and passion for literature has left a huge hole for all of those who were fortunate enough to work alongside him and count him as a friend.

The Montgomery and Mann families always had pets and Matthew inherited his father’s “animal-whisperer” qualities; there was nary a cat or dog that didn’t love Matthew and in his adult years he preferred to adopt senior cats so that they were well-loved in the last years of their lives. Together, Matthew and Lindsay parented - to some degree or another - Delilah, Pootie, Sadie, Maurice, Gremiester, Moogie, Simon, Frankie, Big Boy Ian, Hazel, and Hungry Man. Cat cuddles brought Matthew more joy than anything else in the world. He would always start his day with a coffee, a Sudoku, and one or more cats curled up on his chest or lap. He was so in tune with their needs and they provided him with so much comfort, even on the hardest of days.

Matthew was predeceased by his parents, Lisa and David Montgomery, in January of 2020 and February of 2021, respectively. Matthew’s parents were his touchstones; they loved him to an unparalleled degree, something he never doubted. He was incredibly proud of their work ethics and often spoke of his gratitude for the way they always embraced him for just who he was. To say that their deaths due to cancer - only 13 months apart - had a deep and lasting impact on the way he saw the world would be a drastic understatement. Their deaths shook his hope and sense of justice to the core, especially the knowledge that they were unable to enjoy the retirement they worked so hard for. He loved, respected, and admired both of them with all of his being.

In the years following Lisa and David’s passing, the world grew increasingly bleak for Matthew. He struggled with what he described as “paroxysms of psychic pain” making him feel “like a tiny spider crushed in the smothering embrace of a tissue, just for having the temerity to exist.” He spoke honestly and openly about the challenges he faced with depression, discussion that he felt was vital to breaking down stigma and encouraging others to seek help. He cared so deeply about the well-being of others that even amidst his own struggle and pain he was always there for those who needed him. He was compassionate, empathetic, and endeavoured to use the privilege and opportunities afforded to him to improve the lives of others.

The world would be a much better place if more people approached life with the curiosity and compassion that he did. Unfortunately, we must now learn to navigate the world without him in it. 

We Babu Frikin’ love you, Matthew. 

Always.

A memorial and celebration of Matthew’s life will be held from 6:30pm - 9:00pm on Monday, April 7, 2025 at The Leaf in Assiniboine Park, 145 The Leaf Way.

Matthew’s family kindly requests that all of his friends and relatives take a few minutes to honour his memory by watching the photo-biography above. Please, also consider sharing your own photos, memories, and stories by making use of the comment section on this page.

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ETHICAL DEATH CARE

Cremation & Life Celebrations

530 St. Mary Avenue - Winnipeg

204-421-5501 - www.ethicaldeathcare.com

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